22 Apr When Love Looks Like Obedience: Learning to Love Beyond Familiarity

But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you. Matthew 5:44 NLT

We live in a world where loving those who love us back feels natural, and loving those who have hurt us feels almost impossible. Yet, in Matthew 5, Jesus gives us a deeper call: to love our enemies, to pray for those who persecute us, and to love not based on familiarity or reward but rooted in obedience and Christ-like compassion.

This blog is a personal reflection on that exact kind of love. It’s about what it means to live out a Kingdom standard when the world gives you every reason not to. And how obedience, not comfort, is often where the love of Christ shines the brightest.

Divine Encounters in Unexpected Places

Some days begin so ordinarily, yet end with a whisper from heaven.

It was a fateful day when I decided I’d go grocery shopping. I had planned out exactly what I needed and was excited to stock up. But little did I know that what started as a simple errand would become a heart check — a moment where God would gently redefine what love looks like.

After collecting my items and heading to the till, I realized with a sinking feeling that I didn’t have my bank card. I panicked a little, but strangely, I felt a quiet peace in my heart that everything would be okay. I asked the cashier if I could leave and return with my card, and thankfully, they agreed.

Because I didn’t live too far away, I considered walking. But to speed things up, I ordered an Uber. What I didn’t expect was that this Uber ride would minister to me more than any sermon that day.

The driver was warm, thoughtful, and soon our small talk turned into deep conversation. He asked me about my faith, my relationship with God, and I could tell immediately: this man knew the Lord.

He shared how he had recently been discipling a young man — an 18-year-old who had lost both of his parents. This young man had been suicidal, caught in hopelessness, until this very Uber driver reached out and began walking with him through healing, helping him find work and a reason to live again.

Naturally, I assumed the driver worked with youth. “Oh wow, do you serve young people in your community?” I asked.

His answer stunned me: “No, actually, I’ve never done this before. I didn’t even know this young man. We connected on Facebook, and the Holy Spirit told me to reach out to him.”

That was all he needed — a prompting from the Holy Spirit. And because he obeyed, someone’s life was changed.

I couldn’t stop thinking about it. This man didn’t need to know this teenager to love him. He didn’t need a title, a church program, or a personal connection. He simply obeyed God and loved someone who didn’t “earn” it.

The Uber driver taught me something profound: obedience can look like love. He loved a stranger with his time, his care, his prayers. And it wasn’t just emotional — it was spiritual. It was a choice.

Who Are Our Enemies, Really?

This blog piece is personal because “love your enemies” has been a journey I know well.

We often define enemies the way the world does — villains in movies, abusive exes, jealous co-workers. But I’ve come to see that sometimes, your greatest enemies are people who have deeply hurt you — and once that pain sinks in, it can feel like the love you once had for them dies with it.

For me, that pain came during the breakdown of my family. When my parents divorced, I saw things I never imagined I would. Pain tore through my home, and with it came versions of my family that were angry, cold, distant, and broken. And brokenness has a way of revealing people’s worst sides.

But in the same season that I was trying to protect my heart, God was calling me to love.

Loving Through Brokenness

There is an ease in loving people who love you well. But when love asks you to stretch — to stay soft in the middle of betrayal, to forgive what still stings — it becomes clear that this is a supernatural love.

It was the Holy Spirit who kept pulling me toward forgiveness, not because others deserved it, but because I did not deserve the grace God gave me either.

I am not more righteous than the next person. I’m not better than anyone who has wronged me. That kind of humility doesn’t come naturally, but it does come when you spend time with God, when you realize just how much He loves you despite your own flaws.

The commandment to love the Lord your God, love yourself, and love others isn’t a light suggestion. It’s the foundation of a full life in Christ. And “others” doesn’t mean just those who are good to you. It includes the complicated, the painful, and the unpredictable. The ones who test your growth. The ones you’re still learning to forgive.

Love Is a Lifestyle, Not a Feeling

One of the greatest lessons I’ve learned is that love is not a reward system. It’s not something we give to those who earn it. It’s a posture. A way of life.

That Uber driver taught me something profound: Obedience can look like love. He loved a stranger with his time, his care, his prayers. And it wasn’t emotional. It was spiritual. It was a decision.

God’s Word doesn’t ask us to love when we feel like it. It calls us to love because that’s who He is.

Jesus Himself said in Matthew 5:46–47:

“If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much… If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else?”

When we love like the world, we blend in. When we love like Christ, we stand out. Because that kind of love transforms.

Reflecting the Heart of the Father

The last verse in this passage always used to intimidate me:

“But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect.” Matthew 5:48
But I’ve learned that this verse isn’t demanding flawlessness — it’s pointing us to maturity. It’s an invitation to grow up into the fullness of who God is. To love like Him.

God gives sunlight and rain to the good and the evil alike. He doesn’t withhold His kindness because of our sin. That’s the love we’ve received, and now, that’s the love we’re called to give.

When I reflect on my own story — the hardened heart that God softened, the pain that He is still healing — I realize this kind of love can change lives. It changed mine. And it will change yours, too.

Becoming the Bible Some Have Never Read

My mentor once told me, “Some people will never open the Bible, but they will encounter God through your life.”

That’s never left me.

Your life, your love, your kindness — these are testimonies. You don’t need a pulpit. Your work desk is a pulpit. Your WhatsApp chats are a pulpit. Your dinner table is a pulpit.

Every day, we get the chance to reflect God not just with our words but with our love.

So how do we love our enemies?

We start by praying for them. Even when it’s hard. Especially when it’s hard.

We ask God to soften our hearts, to help us see them the way He does. We surrender our desire to be right, to get even, to stay offended. We ask Him to make us whole so we can love from a healed place — not a bleeding one.

And we remember: we were loved before we ever loved Him.

Takeaways:

• Loving your enemies isn’t about their worthiness — it’s about your obedience.
• Forgiveness is part of your healing journey.
• Love is a lifestyle — not a reaction.
• Your life may be the only Bible some people will read.
• We love because Christ loved us first.

Spend time this week asking God:

Who have I withheld love from? Who do I need to forgive — or begin praying for — even if I don’t feel ready to love them yet?

Write their names down. Pray over them. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you take the first step. You don’t need to feel it — you just need to be willing.

If you’ve been on the receiving end of love that healed you, take time to thank God for the people He used. Then, go be that person for someone else.